I'm cool - huh - I'm no fool

Earlier today I was considering learning the lyrics for 69 Boyz "Booty Drop," mainly because I was imagining what it would be like if the song came on in a bar and I impressed everyone in the bar by knowing all the words. 

But then I was told it would only make me cooler by 3-5%. But knowing the Jonas/ Wayan brothers would increase coolness somewhere around 10%. After some consideration, I deemed this to be true. Granted, Total Amount of Coolness (TAC) after these improvements depends on how much I had to start with. So I conducted some science, with beakers and controls and stuff, and my conclusions are depicted in this fancy graph:

Aubrey O'Day of Danity Kane only scoots ahead of Shia because of the ridiculousness factor. Obviously Notorious B.I.G dominates the competition.

The New Season of Gossip Girl

So last night I finally watched the season premiere of Gossip Girl. It was really bad. The bar was set pretty low to begin with and the show basically rips off every plot-line in the OC, but this was just terrible. There were many reasons why it so bad, but none worse than how the writers have already managed to jump the shark — and it's only episode one of season two! *Spoilers ahead*

So at the end of last season Chuck Bass abandoned Blair in Europe where they are supposed to share a poetic summer romance (Blair having lovingly packed her garters). Blair comes back home with a fake boyfriend who has sloppily claimed to attend both Georgetown and Princeton, putting jealous Chuck and his attendant PI on the case. At the Hamptons White Party, before Fake Boyfriend gets the screws put to him by Chuck, he confesses to Blair that he IS a liar:

"I don't go to Georgetown or Princeton, or any school for that matter... " [Blair looks horrified, because higher education is the backbone of American society.]

[Fake Boyfriend switches to British accent] "My name is actually Marcus Beaton. I'm... British. And... a laaawd." 

Now it's Chuck's turn to look horrified, and also mine.